Conflicts

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Should We Avoid Conflicts in Relationships?

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“Do not marry someone you have not had a big fight with.” The first time I heard this piece of advice, it startled me. It seemed counter-intuitive.

ODJ: valued

We anticipated an amusing evening at church. Whether it would be the antics of our own kids or someone else’s, we were confident the child driven event would elicit laughter. Sure enough, laughter rang out, but my husband and I sat stunned and tried to hide our dismay. What had appeared to others as a funny comment had actually been a joke at my husband’s expense. Though we had felt te

When Friends Disagree

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“Sorry, but I don’t agree with you . . .” This is usually followed by awkward silence and angry tears. I’ve always found it difficult to disagree with someone, because I don’t want to lose a friend.

ODJ: one mission

My husband and I often must act as referees while moderating the differences between our two offspring. They focus on what makes them different instead of what unites them. We frequently remind the two that they need each other—something that’s hard for them to see.
The body of Christ is often recognised more for its divisions than its unity in Jesus. Whether the disagreement centres on d

ODJ: good conflict

Many Christians are masters at avoiding conflicts. Perhaps we confuse “blessed are the peacemakers” (Matthew 5:9) with “blessed are those who avoid unpleasant situations”. But conflict and confrontation weave their way throughout the fabric of the Bible.

As the children of Israel prepared to cross the Jordan River for the first time, they faced literal warfare. But first they

ODJ: cover up

The ambiguity lasted until the 19th century, when Johannes Schulthess discovered a letter written by Zwingli in the archives in Zurich. The reformer’s words revealed that he had been guilty, but also that he had recommitted to living a chaste life.
Schulthess didn’t want to tarnish his hero’s legacy, so he showed the letter to his student and then held it in the flame of his candle. A

ODJ: the real boss

Seven months later, American Secretary of State Hillary Clinton spoke some words in response to attacks on American diplomatic missions in the Middle East that echoed my son’s convictions.

“When Christians are subject to insults to their faith, and that certainly happens, we expect them not to resort to violence,” Clinton said. “The same goes for all faiths. . . . Refraining f

ODJ: backslap back?

When I lived in China I had an American friend who was radically committed to bringing the gospel to that nation. He mastered the Chinese language until even the Chinese thought he spoke exactly like them, with no foreign accent; and he aggressively shared Jesus at every opportunity. Once he was attacked by thugs, and rather than use his larger size to fight back he obeyed Jesus’ command to turn

ODJ: relative peace


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A 60 year old man, atop a tractor, charged at his 69 year old brother in law who was harvesting hay astride his own tractor. The collision resulted in a damaged tyre and the tractor-crasher’s arrest. One law enforcement official commented, “We’ve responded on prior occasions to calls because of differences between the families.” While it’s a bit unclear what the man hoped to accomplish b