Difficult Relationships

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ODJ: justice and faith


As a friend and I watched our children play in the pool, I had no idea that I would soon be swimming in my clothes. But when I saw our kids struggling to stay above the water, I jumped in. My instinct to separate the boys and help my friend’s child may have seemed strange at first, and even a cold response to my own son. I knew, however, that Micah had been underwater only because he had tried t

ODJ: pearls to pigs


I have always been perplexed by today’s reading in Matthew 7. What are these “pearls” being spoken of and who are the “pigs” we’re not to throw them to? 
One suggestion is that the pearl is the kingdom of God (see 13:45), and so a common explanation of this verse goes like this: There’s a beastly group of people for whom the gospel is not to be shared. They will only trample on our

ODJ: recalculating relationships


A comedian once mused that he wished someone would make a Sat Nav for husbands. He said something like this: Sat Nav: “Compliment your wife’s appearance.” Comedian: “Hey, honey, you look really good.” Sat Nav: “Ask her about her day.” Comedian: “How was your day, sweetheart?” Sat Nav: “Pretend to be listening.” Comedian: “Oh . . . Really . . .” Sat Nav: “Flatter your wi

ODJ: let go


I spent the summer of 1992 tumbling, somersaulting and crashing over the waters of a nearby lake. To avoid a grand impression, I was simply trying to learn how to water-ski. The painful endeavor revealed the deep level of determination I carry within me. One of my greatest errors lay in my refusal to let go of the rope and admit defeat when I had fallen. It was not a pretty sight.
 Twenty years

ODJ: squash the beef


During a promotional event, two 73 year old former football stars got into a fistfight on stage. They had a ‘beef’ (a grudge or feud between friends, family members or enemies) dating back to a controversial football game in November 1963. After one of the senior citizens knocked the other off the stage, the crowd yelled at him to “let it go!” In essence, they were telling him to ‘squash

ODJ: serve your oppressor


A few years ago some young men stole my car. They crashed it, damaging it beyond repair, and I was never compensated for it. I even had to pay to have the car towed away from the crash site! By rights, those thieves should have replaced what they stole. 
That type of justice was reflected in the Old Testament rule of “eye for eye” and “tooth for tooth” (Exodus 21:24; Matthew 5:38). T

ODJ: freely given


At the end of a long day, I took a moment to get a head start on my work emails—striving to preempt any surprises I might face at 8 o’clock the next morning. Frustration ebbed throughout my tired mind as I read an email that contained complaints and feelings of entitlement from a student known to be immature in his responses to life’s challenges. I wanted to send back a veiled sting of repro

ODJ: toughest critic


Have you, like me, ever had a person in your life who in many ways is a friend, but is also your toughest critic? If so, do you wonder how to respond properly to this person? 
In my case I know my friend means well, but she often forcefully sends critical comments without seeking my consent to receive her insights. With that in mind I so appreciate how Paul pursued the consent of his friend Phi

ODJ: true value


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Johannes Gutenberg had an idea that would change the world, but he needed money to finance it. He contacted his neighbour, Johann Fust, who loaned him the cash to build his first printing press. Gutenberg initially made money for his loan payments by printing indulgences for the Catholic Church. The job paid well, but Gutenberg had higher hopes for his new machine. He wanted to print Bibles—ma